Today is the Day!

I have been sitting on the idea of wanting to transform myself on a spiritual and physical level...mostly physically actually, for years at this point. It has been so easy to eat myself blind to the life I have built around me. If you have never struggled with weight and anxiety, this read may be boring and shallow. However, if you HAVE I am willing to bet my story is one you can closely relate to. I am going to launch this conversion or journey, inviting you along. It's time. I am ready to put my heart and soul (for longer than three weeks) into a change. Day 1 Weight 259 Ack! How did I let myself get to this number? I want to hate myself, but I know better. It won't solve anything and really the proof is in the pudding! People that love, truly love themselves don't hide from the world and hurt with food. Or do they? I have been doing a lot of research leading up to this journey and I have concluded that a large portion of our nation's issues with food comes from the quality of food available. More on that another time. So... I woke up with the resolve to start. Today is Ash Wednesday and it's already a time to stop and reflect on how to make ourselves closer to God. If God is love and my goal is to love myself and let go of some of the ideas about health and weight that have crippled my efforts in the past...well then, today is the day. Today I started the plan strong, a good amount of lean protein for breakfast, with a glass of lemon water, a 6 oz serving of non-fat, plain Greek yogurt, a cup of green tea, and a big ol' glass of water. I felt good and full and ready for the day ahead. I went to Mass and left Mass feeling gloomy. Was I missing sugar already, am I still jet-lag from just days before returning from a family vacation, or is the doubt sneaking in? You know that monster that lives in our head and tells us we are weak and it's too hard? I don't know. I guess maybe a bit of all those things got me. But I didn't eat crap... I didn't! I had two slices of turkey breast and a cucumber. I was busy for the rest of the day, which helps. This evening we had cod, steamed veggies, and a big green salad. It was good. The kids didn't like the fish, but they ate it. So this tonight, I would say today was all in all a good day, and that I am ready to do it again tomorrow. I will post a picture in the next few days and I need to make a point of taking my measurements too.